Mario & Luigi: Bowser's Retarded Story
by Random Dawn 14
Summary: A really stupid retelling of Bowser's Inside Story. I really fail at summarys. Rated T to be save. I won't be updating for a little while, guys. Sorry
1. An obese Toad

It was a peaceful day in Mushroom Kingdom. And one little Toad was skipping his last class of the day, because he had the most boring teacher in the world.

"Mom! I'm home!"

"Oh. Hello, sweetie. You're home early."

"Yeah. I left school early. What's for dinner?"

His mother looked up in surprise. "You left early? Does your teacher know?"

The Toad shook his little head. "Of course not! She just wouldn't shut up today! Blah blah blah, so I came home."

His mother shook her head angrily. "You naughty little scamp! How will you ever learn anything if you won't stay in school?" she scolded

"Fiiine, I won't cut math class tomorrow." The Toad groaned.

His mother turned back to the stove to stir the soup she was making. "That's a good boy. Now go tell your father it's time to eat."

"Okay." He ran down the hall to his parents' room. He knocked on the door.

"DAAAD! Dinner's ready!"

Silence.

"Dad?" He opened the door. "Dad, dinner's rea—"

The boy's mother ladled soup into three bowls, wondering what was taking her son so long. She put the three bowls on the table, and then…

"HOLY MOTHER OF MUSHROOMS!"

The young Toad ran back into the kitchen. His mother looked up. "What's wrong, honey? Where's your father?"

"Its dad, he's...he's OBESE!" the Toad cried. From now on, we're going to call him Danny.

At that moment, the house began to shake as Danny's father crashed through the bedroom wall and roll into the kitchen. Danny's father did seem obese indeed. He was ten-times the normal size of an average Toad.

Luckily, Danny and his mother ran away before they got squished.

Danny's mother looked horrified. "NO! Honey!"

**How am I doing so far?  
I'll try to update as soon as I can. :)**


	2. Star Sprites are useless

**Sky Volty: Thanks!^^ Yeah, I wanted to laugh as typing that part, but my mom was in the room and she doesn't know about Fanfiction, so I just bit my lip.:P**

* * *

The next morning, at Princess Peach's castle, Peach and Mario were just waking up.

"Good morning, beautiful," Mario said as he leaned over to kiss Peach. "How was your night?"

"Mine was wonderful with you by my side." She answered.

Okay, enough of that. We don't have time to write the whole song here.

Sighing, Peach got up to look out the window. "I wish we didn't have to get up yet. But, I have to get that emergency meeting started soon." She frowned. "I just can't imagine how this whole 'Blorb' thing got started. Those poor Toads…"

"Yeah, it's pretty bizarre." Mario agreed. "Hopefully, this isn't the work of a villain like Bowser. Maybe Toad Town just needs to diet more."

Peach giggled. "Shouldn't you go home before Luigi wakes up and wonders where you are?"

"Crap, you're right." Mario quickly jumped out of the bed and grabbed his clothes.

He opened the bedroom door and found himself face-to-face with a young girl.

She stared in surprise. "Hey, Dawn. Bye, Dawn." Mario rushed past her, hoping Luigi hadn't woken up yet.

"…"

The girl walked into the room. "Princess, was that…Mario?"

"Yes. It's a long story, just don't tell Luigi."

"Right…" _Wow,_ she thought to herself, _how long has he been here? Hmm…_

"Uh, anyway, I just wanted to remind you that the meeting regarding the Blorbs is to start in—" She checked her watch. "—ten minutes."

"Shoot. I'm not even dressed yet." Peach hurried to her closet.

"Don't worry, Peach," Dawn said. "I'll stall for you." Peach smiled at her.

"Thank you, Dawn." Dawn smiled back. "No prob."

She hurried off to where the meeting was to be held.

Fifteen minutes later, accompanied by Toadsworth, Peach entered the meeting room.

She smiled awkwardly. "Hello, everyone. I'm sorry I'm late. Perhaps someone could fill me in on what we've learned about the Blorbs?"

A Toad named Toadbert stood up, holding a clipboard. He cleared his throat.

"We've interviewed Blorbed Toads, and it seems that they all got sick after eating a 'Blorb Mushroom'."

"Why would they be stupid enough to eat a mushroom with the word 'Blorb' in it?" Dawn asked out loud.

Everyone stared at her.

Dawn did a sweatdrop.

"Uh, sorry." She laughed nervously. "Please, go on."

Peach sighed. "So you're telling me that a mushroom is the cause of all this crap?" she asked. Toadbert nodded.

"Seems that way. And to answer your question, Dawn, it's not like the Blorbs was a disease before now."

"Oh."

"The number of Blorbed Toads grows everyday—" _Just like the number fat people back in America,_ Dawn thought. "—but the doctors are doing all they can to help."

"Where did those evil little motherfu—I mean mushrooms come from?" Peach asked.

Toadbert looked down at his clipboard. "All the Toads we interviewed said they bought them from a suspicious guy wearing a cape. Apparently, he's not from this kingdom."

"We sent word to the Star Sprites," Toadsworth added, "but it seems they just don't care about what happens to the Toads, because they haven't replied."

"Wonderful," Peach sighed again. She was about to say something else, when they all heard a tiny voice say, "Excuse me, is this the meeting room?" Everyone faced the doorway and saw what appeared to be a floating yellow Bob-omb with a star above its head. "Sorry it took me so long to get here. I got a little lost." It giggled nervously.

"Ah, you must be a Star Sprite. I'm Princess Peach."

"Hello yello! I'm Starlow. The Star Sprites sent me to help you."

"Oh, so you can cure the Blorbed Toads?" Toadsworth asked hopefully.

"Er, no."

"God dang it!"

"Well, I'm sorry," Starlow said quickly. "But there are just some things even a Star Sprite can't do! Besides, if I could cure the Blorbs for you, there would be no plot for the story."

_Oops,_ Starlow thought. _I just broke the Fourth Wall._ Toadsworth sighed. "I understand, I'm sorry. Oh. And you just broke the Fourth Wall."

"Yes, I know that."

"I guess we just have to wait for Mario to arrive," Peach said. "Surely he'll know what to do..."

"Come on, Luigi! We're late!"

Luigi hopped after Mario, one shoe barely on, trying to button his overalls.

"I'm coming, I'm—WHOA!" Luigi tripped and fell on his face, his one shoe falling off his foot.

"Ow…"

Mario facepalmed. "Nice one, Weege."

"MARIO!" A Toad ran up to the two Bros. "Dang, about time you got here. Everyone's waiting for you." He noticed Luigi. "Oh. You brought Luigi, super."

_We're all doomed,_ he thought. Out loud he said, "So then, I'll just take you guys to the meeting room. This way."

Luigi buttoned his overalls, put his shoe back on, then he and Mario followed the Toad.

* * *

**Quick little note: If you are an American and you're fat, I didn't mean to offend you in anyway. If I _did _offend somebody, let me just say I'm very sorry.**

**~Dawn**


	3. A boring meeting

**Sky Volty: I'm sorry to read that again, but thanks.:)  
Heh heh, good to know that part got a laugh out of someone.:D  
yoshiandthekoopalingsrawesome: *Gasp* How dare you call me a liar! Ha ha, jk.:)**

* * *

Everyone looked up as the Mario Bros. entered the room.

"Ah. Welcome, Master Mario. Hello, Master Luigi." Toadsworth greeted.

"Sorry we're late," Mario apologized. He sat down next to Toadbert at one end of the U shaped table. Luigi sat facing him at the other end.

"Quite all right, Master Mario." Toadsworth began filling Mario in on what had been discussed earlier.

Luigi wasn't listening. He yawned.

Dawn smiled at him. "You look tired," she whispered. "Not used to getting up at eight o'clock in the morning, huh?"

Luigi shook his head. "Not really." He whispered back. "Mario didn't even give me time to eat breakfast." He frowned as his stomach grumbled.

Dawn silently stood up and walked over to a table set up in a corner of the room.

She soon came back with two cups of orange juice and a muffin. She placed one of the cups along with the muffin in front of Luigi, then took a sip of juice out of the other cup.

Dawn smiled as she whispered, "Enjoy."

Luigi grinned. "Thank you." He began to eat.

"And so," Peach was saying, "we must find out where those mushrooms came from and who was selling them!"

"So, where did those Toads buy the mushrooms?" Mario asked Toadbert.

Toadbert glanced at his clipboard again. He really loved that thing. It made taking and checking notes so easy.

"According to one Toad, the mysterious merchant was simply wandering around town selling the Blorb Mushrooms. No one knows where he went after that."

Mario frowned as he rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "Hmm, that doesn't give us much to go on."

Luigi yawned again. He knew he should be listening to what Peach was saying, but he felt so tired…

He laid his head down on the table and fell asleep.

"How do we take this guy down if we can't even find him?" Mario wondered out loud.

"I don't know," Peach admitted. "But I know you'll do your best. You always do, Mario."

The red-clad plumber blushed.

"You could try interviewing more Toads," Dawn suggested. "Surely _someone_ could have seen where this guy went."

"Ah, a splendid idea, Dawn." Toadsworth said. He turned to Mario.

"And once you finally find this troublemaker, have at him as if he were Bowser!"

A deep laugh was heard.

"Did someone page the king of awesome?"

Everyone faced the doorway.

Peach and Dawn screamed.

Toads panicked.

Mario got ready to fight.

Toadsworth passed out.

Starlow just floated like the useless thing she was.

And Luigi…slept.

Standing in the doorway, was Bowser himself.

* * *

**Oh noes, it's Bowser!:o  
****I'll work on the next chapter ASAP. And for anyone who cares, Interviewing the Cast of Bowser's Inside Story will be updated tomorrow. To anyone who's left a review for that story, I love ya all!^^**

**~Dawn**


	4. Bowser Does Something Stupid

**Lemmy Koopa Is Awesome: Reading that first part makes me feel like  
****it's been a long since I updated this. DX But anyway, glad you enjoyed it. :)**

**Friend of Fawful: Thanks. :)  
Dude, I'm sure you know by now that I love this game, so of course I'm continue it! XD**

**Hawkholly : First time: *Stupidly grins with you*  
Second time: I would love to do that. :) Next time you login PM me and we'll talk. :)**

**Zora Princess: *Bows* Thank you. :D**

**Guest: It was deleted. -_- I didn't even get any warning reviews. DX**

* * *

Bowser punched through the bottom of the U shaped table and walked up to Peach.

"Bowser! What are you doing here?" Peach asked.

"Well duh! I live here, your royal genius." Bowser replied.

"You're crazy," Starlow said. "You don't live here! So just get out!"

"Oh, yeah?" Bowser growled. "Who asked you?"

"No one. But—"

"But it doesn't matter," Dawn cut in. "Because we all know you don't live here.

Bowser turned to Dawn, wondering who the heck she was. "Yes, I do."

"No you don't."

"Yes I do."

No you don't!"

"Yes I do!"

This went on for a few minutes before Mario jumped up.

"Would both of you shut up!" They both turned to him.

"…" Dawn quickly shut up.

Bowser turned around. "Mario! When did_ you_ get here?"

Mario did a sweatdrop. "I've been here the whole time…"

"…oh."

"Let's just battle and get this over with."

"Fine. Then I'm kidnapping Peach!"

So Mario and Bowser started to battle. And because I'm lazy and don't like to write battle scenes, I will say this: Toadsworth annoyed everyone by "reminding" Mario how to battle, and Mario (After getting Toadsworth to shut up, of course.) won the battle.

"Yes!" Starlow cheered looking at Peach. "My Star Power combined with your Wishing Power weakened him."

"W-what?"

"Let's finish this," Peach said, ignoring Bowser. She raised her right arm and, with Starlow's help, flung Bowser out of the castle through the roof.

Mario did another sweatdrop. "Whoa…"

"If only she would do that more often," Dawn mused. "Maybe Mario wouldn't have to save her all the time."

Meanwhile, somewhere in Dimble Wood, Kamek was laying in the soft grass watching the clouds slowly drift away in the sky.

If only Bowser could finally kidnap Peach for good. Maybe everyday could be this relaxing.

"That cloud looks a lot like King Bowser," Kamek chuckled. "Although, it almost seems like its falling out of the sky…"

There was a loud thud as Bowser landed next to the head Magikoopa.

"Hmm, I guess it _was_ King Bowser,"

Kamek sighed as he got out his wand. "Lose to Mario again?" he asked the unconscious Koopa king.

He chuckled again, as he knew the answer already.

"Wake up!" Kamek yelled, as he casted a refreshing spell.

After casting the spell a few more times, Bowser finally woke up.

Groaning, he stood up.

"So, you failed to kidnap Peach again, huh?" Kamek asked, knowing all too well what the reply would be.

Bowser sighed. "Yeah, I failed. Again."

The Magikoopa shook his head. "I told it would be a bad idea to try while there was a big meeting going on."

Bowser growled. "It does _not_ end like this! I'm going back to the castle to kidnap Peach!"

Kamek stared at him.

"…for real this time."

"Except for the fact that Mario is probably still there. In that case, he'll once again kick your—"

"DON'T SAY THAT NAME!" Bowser roared, while breathing fire.

"Whoa, chill out." Kamek pulled his flying broomstick out off Hammer Space and flew away.

"Chill nothing, I have a princess to capture!"

And with that, Bowser realized he had no freaking idea as to where he was.

"Hmm, I have no freaking idea as to where I am!" he cried.

…yes, thank you, Bowser.

Anyway, so he started to burn down trees and punch giant rocks to get out of the forest faster. I'm sure no one will miss the giant rocks, but burning down the trees is a little too much…

"How much farther to I have to go until I find some civilization?" Bowser wondered.

"A WINNER IS YOU!" someone called out to him.

"Not too far, I guess." Bowser shrugged as he walked toward the mysterious person's voice.

He soon found a carnival-like both set up in a wall of rock.

The person behind the counter had a hood over his head, so Bowser couldn't see his face.

"A winner is you!" the hooded boy behind the counter said again.

Bowser pointed at himself. "Who, me?"

The person sighed. "Yes, you."

"What did I win?" the confused Koopa king asked. "I didn't buy anything!"

"Jackpotting!"

Wow, this guy is _way _too excited, Bowser thought to himself.

Kamek floated down toward Bowser. He knew the Koopa couldn't be trusted to _not _do something stupid for more than five minutes.

"What's going on here?" Kamek asked Bowser.

I don't know, this freaky guy keeps going on about jackpotting and wining or something."

"This customer has luck!" the stranger said. "And with luck comes this Lucky Shroom!"

He held up a mushroom that was a sickly shade of green and had purple spots on top.

"I-I don't think you should eat that mushroom, King Bowser." Kamek said.

He had a bad feeling about it.

"But, it will power your Luck to Super Luck!" the person said. "All of your hit will be Lucky! You'll have such fury!"

"How lucky?" Bowser asked suspiciously.

"Lucky enough to, oh, I don't know… Beat Mario!"

Bowser looked shocked.

"Seriously?"

The stranger grinned. "I say to you, yes!" he said joyfully.

"Bowser…" Kamek started to say.

"Wait. But what If I eat this 'Lucky Shroom' and start randomly inhaling anything and everything around me and that becomes the start of some weird plot?" Bowser asked, unsure of how he though all that up.

The person sighed. "Dude, just take the fricking shroom so we can both move on with our lives."

"…"

Bowser shrugged. "Well, as long it'll help me beat Mario…"

So Bowser ate the suspicious mushroom.

"Yuck! That tasted weird…" Bowser complained.

A few moments later, he started to feel…weird.

"King Bowser?"

Kamek sighed and did a facepalm. "I told you not to eat that thing…"

He turned to the stranger. "All right, you! What was in that mushroom you fed Bowser?"

By that time, the odd person was on some sort of a hovercraft. He pulled back his hood to reveal he was young Beanish from the Beanbean Kingdom.

Although Kamek didn't know it at the time, and Bowser felt too sick to care, the mysterious stranger was none other than…

DUN DUN DUNNNNN!

Fawful!

And oh boy did he have a bone to pick with Mario and Luigi!

He laughed an evil laugh.

"Oh, Bowser. You have much stupidness!" he said, grinning.

With that remark, he flew off.

And with good reason: Bowser had opened his mouth and was started to randomly inhale things around him!

Kamek also flew away.

Bowser, for reasons probably only Fawful can explain, headed for Peach's Castle.

"Well, that's _one _way to break up a meeting…" Dawn commented, looking around the trashed room.

"I don't think we can really continue the meeting in this room," Peach said. "We'll have to find another room to go to."

"I'll find one!" Dawn said, always happy to help out.

Peach nodded. "Okay, Dawn. The rest of us will wait for you to come back.

Dawn smiled then left the room.

While Dawn was looking for another meeting room, everyone else played poker. Because go fish just wasn't exciting enough for them.

Luigi sighed. "This is getting boring. How hard could it be to find another room?"

"This castle's huge," Mario pointed out. "Plus she has to find a room big enough to hold a meeting."

Just then, somewhere in the real world, the author remembered that _Luigi was supposed to be asleep still_.

The author facepalmed herself.

Back in the Mushroom Kingdom, Luigi randomly fell asleep again.

The others shrugged and when on with the game.

A random Toad ran into the room. "Princess Peach! Bowser's back!"

Peach looked confused. "What about his back?"

Her face lit up. "Ohhh, you mean he's back at the castle!"

The Toad did a facepalm. "Yes!"

Then he ran out again.

Mario sighed, choosing not to comment on Peach's fail moment. "He just doesn't give up, does he? Oh well, I can take him on again and throw him out before Dawn comes back."

Mario stood up, ready to fight again, but he never got the chance.

When Bowser walked in he started randomly inhaling everyone.

"Mario, help!" Peach cried as she was inhaled.

"Peach!" Starlow cried as she, too was swallowed.

Toadsworth and Toadbert were also swallowed.

"WHAT THE FU—" Mario's cry was, fortunately, cut short.

Luigi yawned and opened his eyes. "Huh…? HOLY SH—"

Luigi's cry was also cut short.

Shortly after inhaling everyone, Bowser passed out.

Fawful walked into the room, laughing. "This has much easiness!" he chortled.

"PEACH! We have a problem!" Dawn yelled as she ran up behind Fawful.

Fawful turned around in surprise.

Dawn stopped running. "Oh crap."

"…"

"I guess I'm too late, huh?" she asked doing a sweatdrop.

* * *

**I can't begin to tell you all the times I laughed at something I typed up for this chapter.  
I figure either the readers will laugh, too, or I have a weird sense of humor. You decide. XD**

**~Dawn**


	5. Problems

**Surprise! Bet you didn't think I would so soon, huh? XD**

**Friend of Fawful: You're welcome, as always. :)  
I think it was deleted because I answered your questions. No, don't feel feel bad or blame yourself.  
I was happy to answer them, even if the story was taken down. ^^**

**amedileen: Thanks! *Puts up sticker that says Medi Approved* :D  
Hey, can I put that in the summary? Please? :3**

**Hawkholly: YAY! Glad you loved it. :) Why won't your dad let you PM people?  
*Blushes* Aww, no I'm not. But I _do _have a thing for writing humor stories, if I do say so myself. :3**

**SuperSockMonkey: Ha ha! You'll have to let me know how I did with Fawful's weird way of talking in this chapter. :D**

* * *

"So then, I take it you're here to try and take over the kingdom?" Dawn asked Fawful.

She had lived in Peach's Castle long enough to know how things went around there.

Fawful nodded, but said nothing. He had been sure Bowser had inhaled everyone in the castle that wasn't a useless Toad! Having this girl around could end up being a problem for him.

"Are you going to take me as a prisoner now?"

Fawful sighed. This girl asked too many questions.

"That would be seeming like a good idea." he answered.

Dawn also sighed. "At least today's the last day of school. I probably won't miss too much."

She looked at Bowser lying on the floor. "What happened? Why is he here again?

And where is everyone? Why would they all leave with you trying to take over?

What did you do them?"

"YOU ASK TOO MANY QUESTIONS!"

Dawn did a sweatdrop.

"Sorry. But seriously, what the freak happened?"

"Not that is it being any of the business that is your, it is all being part of my plan of takeover the kingdom of mushrooms."

"It is too my business!" Dawn said, instantly translating what the Bean had said. "I _do _live here, you know."

Fawful shook his head. Bowser had to be moved somewhere else before he woke up, and this girl with all her questions wasn't helping any. She clearly was going to be a pain in the neck.

She had to go.

"Midbus! Come! Fawful calls you."

Dawn sighed again. "So, you're not alone, huh?"

"You called, Lord Fawful?"

Dawn looked at the new arrival then looked up at the ceiling of the room.

"Dear Grambi help me."

Mario groaned and sat up slowly.

Rubbing his head, he thought, "Mama mia, where am I?"

He tried to remember what happened.

They were waiting for Dawn, a Toad ran in warning them Bowser had come back,

Mario had gotten ready fight, and then Bowser…

"Holy crap! Bowser ate us!" Mario cried, jumping to his feet.

Then another thought crossed his mind. "Oh no, Peach! I have to save her!"

So Mario ran around for a while, trying to get over the fact that he was _in _Bowser's body.

After a while, he saw Starlow. She seemed to be in trouble.

"Hey, Starlow!" he called.

"Mario! You've got to help me!" Starlow cried.

She was in some sort of pink bubble thing. Mario looked for a way to reach her.

He noticed three pipes on the floor. Two of them were under the floor, so he couldn't get in them, but one was poking out.

Wasting no time, Mario went into the pipe.

Instead of landing on the platform under Starlow, he hit a pink block floating above the pipe.

That made another pipe rise up.

Mario understood what he had to do. He jumped into the new pipe and managed to hit the other pink block. A third pipe popped out of the ground.

"Mario, what's taking so long?" Starlow asked.

"I'm coming!"

Mario jumped into the last pipe and flew up towards Starlow. He reached out and freed her from the bubble!

She breathed a sigh of relief. "Thanks, Mario. I thought I'd be stuck in that thing forever!"

"No problem," Mario said. He was about to ask Starlow if she had seen the princess when she cried out, "Mario! Look out!"

He turned around and that the "bubble" had turned into what looked like a Goomba.

It was going to attack!

Mario expertly jumped on its head before it could hurt him.

The battle finished as quickly as it had started.

"As I going to ask before that thing attacked," Mario started, "have you seen the princess around here?"

Starlow looked worried. "Actually, no. I never thought about if she's okay…"

Starlow broke down crying. "I'm a terrible Star Sprite!"

Mario sighed. "Don't worry about it. Even if Peach found out, I'm sure she would understand."

"R-really?"

"Yes. Now come on, we should go find her and the others."

So, with the star thing—I mean Starlow—to join him, Mario continued walking through Bowser's insides. Yuck.

As they walked, Mario couldn't help but worry what was going on in the outside world.

How did Bowser suddenly get the power to inhale everyone?

Could Bowser's new ability and the Blorbs be connected to each other somehow?

"Uh, Mario?"

Mario didn't answer.

Starlow looked at him. He seemed to be thinking hard about something.

Starlow could think of only one way to get him to listen to her:

"Hey, listen! Hey, listen! Hey!"

At first Mario didn't hear her, but a few minutes of Starlow constantly repeating what she said, he got tired of it.

"Hey! Hey, listen! Hey—"

"Shut up, Starlow!"

The Star Sprite's feeling weren't hurt.

"Finally! Look over there, Mario. We found Luigi!"

Mario looked up and quickly forgot how annoying Starlow had been.

Sure enough, they found Luigi.

Unfortunately, he was trapped in a bubble thing like the one that Starlow had been stuck in.

"How do we get him down?" Starlow wondered.

"Like this," Mario jumped up, grabbed Luigi's legs, and pulled him down.

"Luigi," Mario whispered.

Luigi jumped to his feet. "Mario!"

The two brothers hugged each other.

"Where are we, Bro? Luigi asked looking confused.

Mario started to explain, but was interrupted by two more of those Goomba-like things.

Frustrated, he sighed. "Come on, Bro! We can take them if we work together!"

Starlow watched as the two brother worked together to defeat the Goombules.

They high-fived each other. "Nice job, Bro!" Luigi said happily. "Maybe now you could tell me where we are?"

While the three of them walked, Mario tried to explain what had happened.

"Mama mia! So we're _inside _Bowser's body?" Luigi asked.

"We seem to be," Mario replied. "Now we have to find the others then figure a way out."

"I wonder how… Whoa!" Luigi fell as he tripped over something.

Mario picked it up.

"What is it?" Starlow asked.

"Toadbert's clipboard," Mario helped Luigi up then put the clipboard in Hammer Space.

"Thanks. As I was saying, I wonder how—"

"Bowser could inhale us?" Mario guessed.

"Yeah."

"Who knows? But I have a bad feeling that it might be connected with the Blorbs."


	6. Dawn's Escape

**New chapter, yay!  
Also, I changed the cover image thing for this story. You guys like it? XD**

**-Edit- Oh crap, I forgot to answer the reviews for the last chapter! D:**

**Hawkholly: Thanks. :)  
I can't believe I forgot to ask you about her when we were PMing over the weekend. XP  
Next time we do, why don't you tell me about Crystal the Emoglobin? lol**

**Friend of Fawful: lol! Thanks, here it is! XD**

**Zora Princess: 1: Just yell back that it's true. lol  
2: Yeah, I'm not that big of a fan of swearing, either, but since they were cut off, they can be saying what ever you want them to say. :)  
3: Rude is the word I would use, but that works, too. :P**

**FAmedileen: Thank you! :)**

**SuperSockMonkey: lol, that would be and weird at the same time. XD  
Thanks for reminding me about that. :P**

**GirlNamedFede: Same as FAmedileen, thank you! :)**

* * *

Later that afternoon, a girl walked into Peach Castle.

She looked a little like Dawn, but her hair was shorter and she had it dyed pink.

Her name was Star, and she was worried about Dawn. It wasn't like Dawn to skip school,

even on the last day.

Star was glad it had been a half day, she didn't think she could have made through a whole day worrying.

"Dawn?" she called out. "Mario? Princess Peach?"

There seemed to be no one there. Star sighed.

"Not good," she muttered.

She dug her cell phone out off her pocket and quickly texted Dawn.  
"Where r u?" she typed.

After five minutes of not getting a reply, Star began to panic.

Something was very wrong. She could tell.

With another sigh, Star sat down on a near by chair.

All she could do was wait for Dawn to reply and hope she was okay.

And Star Kohana was not good at waiting!

Dawn found that being a hostage was both scary and exciting. She wondered how Peach put up with it all the time.

This was her first time, and she hoped with all her heart she wouldn't have to get used to it.

She was a smart girl, and she knew she had to get away somehow.

The only problem was, she had nowhere _to _go. If Mario, Luigi, Peach, and all the others were gone, who could she run to?

Even if she _did _have a place to go, chances of escape were slim.

If she were being escorted by Fawful to where ever the Underwhere they were going, she could easily overpower him and run for her life.

However, Fawful gone ahead to do whatever the heck crazy, evil Beans do when they're taking over a kingdom.

Dawn had serious doubts she could overpower Midbus.

So she walked in silence, planning.

She _did _have a plan, but she was hesitant about trying it.

She had a gift.

A gift that could help her a lot, but she was worried. She was still learning how it worked.

In theory, she could sing to make herself seem hypnotic. From there, she had learned to make someone go to sleep, or simply just be hypnotist by her voice.

But it didn't always work.

Mesmerizing Song, as Dawn liked to call her power, tended to fail when she was nervous and couldn't remember the lyrics to the song she was singing.

And right now she was pretty scared, so if she was going to do this, she would have to clam down a little first.

So Dawn did the one thing that relaxed her next to singing: She started humming.

While humming, she looked around trying to figure out where she was being taken. At least she had a good idea of where they were now. Dawn was very familiar with Darkland Forest.

She realized by now school would be out for the day.

Actually, for the summer.

Star had most likely realized she was gone by now, as well as Peach, Mario, and everyone else for that matter.

_Holy crap_, Dawn thought to herself, _me and Star are the Mushroom Kingdom's last hopes! We better not screw up_…

She had to act now, so she started singing Everybody Talks by Neon Trees.

She glanced at Midbus to make sure she had his attention, and sure enough he was looking at her, most likely wondering why, after being so quiet this whole time, she was suddenly singing.

"…"

Dawn just smiled and continued singing.

Her plan wouldn't have worked if he had ignored her. She needed to have his _full_ attention to do this.

Quick as she could, Dawn forced them to be eye-to-eye. That was a big part in making this work.

She smiled again. Her plan was working, after all.

By the time she had finished the song, Midbus was peacefully sleeping.

"I know that wasn't the _best _of songs for a lullaby," Dawn said apologetically, "but it was stuck my head all morning."

With those parting words, Dawn walked away deeper into Darkland Forest.

"Dang, that was easy." She giggled. "He's going to hate me so much when he wakes up."

Her cell phone buzzed in her pocket.

She pulled it out and saw she five messages from Star. They were all asking where she was and what was going on.

Dawn hastily called Star. Her phone rang only once before she answered.

"Dawn? Is that you?" Star sounded anxious.

"Yeah, it's me."

"Oh my Grambi! Dawn! Are you okay? What happened? _Where are you_?!"

"Relax, Star. Everything's fine for now." Dawn said calmly.

"_For now_? What do you mean 'for now'"?

Dawn explained the situation.

Star giggled. "Dawn, you're so evil sometimes!" Dawn didn't laugh.

"Star! Be serious! The Mushroom Kingdom is in danger!"

"Sorry. On a more _serious_ note, Fawful isn't going to be away doing 'whatever' for long, and his friend isn't going to be asleep forever. What are you going to do? They're sure to catch up with you sooner or later."

"Then let's make it later," Dawn replied. "Where are you?"

"Peach's Castle."

"Do your parents know where you are?"

Star sighed. "No, but they're away for a few weeks anyway."

"Star! Just where do they think you are?"

"Um, no clue, but if I figure out, I'll let you know."

Dawn facepalmed herself.

"Whatever. Just meet me at Bowser's castle."

"WHAT?! Why?"

"Because, I get the feeling that's where we were going anyway. Might as well take them by surprise and do what we can to save the kingdom. Besides, I have some good friends in Bowser's army."

"Wait," Star sounded confused. "Then where are _you_?"

Dawn chuckled. "Just meet me there, okay?"

"Okay. Can't say I'm thrilled to go there, but I trust you. See ya in a few!"

Star hung up, so Dawn also hung up and put her phone away, then jogged towards Bowser's castle.

Mario, Luigi, and Starlow were still walking around in the Trash Pit.

"Man, this place goes on _forever_," Luigi complained.

"Shut up and walk," Starlow said.

Mario, sensing a fight coming on, started singing Fireflies by Owl City. Luigi soon joined him.

When you live with Dawn, you can't help but pick up on some of the songs she sings.

Starlow was impressed.

"Wow, you two are pretty good. Why aren't you guys in a brand instead of plumbers?" she asked.

Mario smiled but shook his head. "Not our thing. Trust me, once you meet Dawn, you'll understand."

"But, I _have _met her! At the meeting, remember?" Starlow reminded him.

"Fine, once you get to know her better."

They continued walking for a while.

Eventually they made it out of the Trash Pit. Along the way Mario and Luigi got some hammers and some Attack Pieces for a Special Attack, which Starlow taught them to use.

The trio soon made it to a room full of Toads.

"Um…" Luigi wasn't sure what to say. They seemed to be right at home here!

Mario walked up to one. "Hey, what's going on here?"

"Mario! Good to see you! All of us got together here and out of pure boredom, opened some shops! Safety in numbers, you know!"

"Right… Have anyone you seen the princess?"

The Toad thought for a while.

"Nope, can't say we have. Come to think of it...we haven't seen Toadsworth, Toadbert, or _anyone _but us Toads until you showed up."

Mario thought about that for a minute, then nodded.

"Okay then, we'll rest here for a few minutes then explore some more and try to find the others."

He noticed Luigi looked worried. "What's wrong, Bro?" he asked.

Luigi sighed. "I just hope Dawn's okay. She wasn't in the room with us when Bowser came…so she must still be in the outside world, alone…"

Mario smiled at his bro reassuringly. "I wouldn't worry about her too much. She's pretty tough and can take care of herself for a little while. Besides, she has Star, too."

Luigi smiled back. "I guess you're right,"

He sighed again. "But still…"

* * *

**If I made any mistakes while answering reviews like leaving out a letter in a word, blame my keyboard. :P  
It's being funny lately. The keys seem unresponsive when I'm on the Internet, but when I type up stories on MS Word, they're fine! DX**

**~Dawn**


	7. Dawn Kills the Fourth Wall

**Everyone, I have some news: This might be the last time I update this story for a while.  
I'm just finding it hard to enjoy writing this story and I want to do some free writing where I don't have to follow a story like I have to with this. Sorry. :(**

**CrystalClearCourier: Thanks. :)  
Ha ha, I've replayed it quiet a few times. lol, I've heard PiT isn't the _best_ Mario game. :P**

**AwesomeDragonGirl1601: No, but I'll look for it when I find time to. :)**

**Friend of Fawful: Yes I did. I know, right? From what I can remember (I haven't looked at a pic of Toad in a while), Toads wear hats, vests, shoes, and diapers. Yes, I said diapers. XD**

**Hawk of the Cherrywood Vines: I had fun chatting with you. :D**

**Wafflegirl0304: Ha ha, thanks. The Fourth Wall breaking is going to get worse in this chapter... O_o**

**PondGirl11: Thanks. Here it is. :)**

* * *

After resting for a while, the three heroes left the Toad Square and moved on to the room under the Trash Pit.

"Where are we?" Luigi wondered out loud.

"No idea, Bro," Mario answered. "What do you think, Starlow?"

Starlow didn't say anything, she appeared to be thinking.

"Hmm, I wonder…no, couldn't be…"

"Uh, Starlow?"

Starlow turned to Mario. "Could you guys wait here for a moment? I have to check something out up ahead."

"Sure," Mario said, confused.

Starlow floated deeper into the small room, then came back a little while later.

"I found something interesting up there," she said.

"What is it?" Luigi asked.

"It's easier for me to show you then to explain."

Starlow led the bros to what appeared to be a nerve sticking out of a wall.

"I think," she said, "that if you hit that nerve with your hammer, Mario, something will happen."

"Uh, okay then." Mario shrugged, got his hammer from Hammer Space, and hit the nerve as hard as he could.

Meanwhile, in the outside world, Bowser was awakened by a sudden pain in his body.

He yawned. "Whoa, _that _was a weird dream."

The sharp pain came back.

"Ow! Dang, what was that?" he wondered.

It happened again.

"Ouch! What the Underwhere?"

"Hey, up there! Can you hear me?" a voice said.

Bowser jumped, startled. "Who said that?"

"Me, I'm in your body."

"WHAT? You're _inside _my body? What are you doing in there?!" he growled.

He heard a soft sigh. "It's kind of hard to explain right now… Where are you right now?"

That's when Bowser finally realized he didn't know. He looked around and saw he was in a cave of some sort.

"Hmm, I'm in a cave. What am I doing in this cave?"

Starlow started to wonder the same thing. "Do you remember what happened to you before?" she asked.

"Well…I was walking through a forest, then I met this weird guy who gave a weird purple mushroom to eat…and the rest is blank. Hmm, weird guy…weird mushroom… Nope, doesn't make any senses!"

Starlow sighed again. "This could be bad," she said to Mario and Luigi. "I mean, maybe it's better that he doesn't know you guys are here, but…"

"But he doesn't remember anything that could help us figure out what's going on," Mario finished for her.

"Right. Well, we should just let Bowser do his thing for now."

"Hey, weird voice in my body!" Bowser said suddenly. "Are you still there or what?"

"Yes, I'm here. Why don't you get out of this cave or something?"

"Well, duh! I was about to do that, anyway."

So Bowser started randomly walking around, trying to get out of the cave.

He soon across a web thing over an exit.

"An exit! I'll just burn this web down and leave," Bowser opened his mouth to breath out fire.

But nothing happened.

"That's weird…" He tried again.

And again, and again…

"It's not working!" Bowser cried.

"What's not working?" Starlow asked, even though she didn't care.

"My fire powers!"

"Oh, so you can't breathe fire right now?"

"Yeah, and I blame you."

"Me?!" Starlow looked up glaring even though Bowser couldn't see her. "What did _I _do?"

"How should I know? My fire was fine before _you _came along!" Bowser growled at her.

"Well, I have nothing to do with it. And before you ask, no, I can't fix it.

So just deal with it for now!"

"…"

Starlow cleared her throat. "Anyway, shouldn't you be trying to get out of that cave or something?"

"Fine, I'm going!"

So Bowser continued exploring the cave and soon found the real exit.

"Well, _that _was easy enough," he thought.

He walked out into the area known as Cavi Cape.

Wait, was the cave _part_ of Cavi Cape? I don't even know…

Bowser stopped by a cliff.

"What are you _doing_ up there?" Starlow asked, getting irritated.

"Hmm, I feel like something's supposed to happen here…" Bowser said.

Meanwhile, at Bowser's castle…

Dawn had a serious look on her face.

"What are you thinking about?" Star asked.

"Hmm… I just got the sudden feeling I've done something to break a storyline or something…"

"Star looked confused. "Huh?"

Dawn looked up at the sky. "Hey, excuse me, miss author person? Did I do something wrong?"

The author, who didn't care that the Fourth Wall had been broken _beyond repair _answered, "Well, let me check my guide book…"

Dawn sighed and Star wondered what was going on.

A few minutes later, the author spoke again.

"Okay, it looks like Bowser has exited Cavi Cape cave."

"How do you know that?"

"I'm the author, of course. Anyway, right now there's supposed to be a cut-scene between Bowser and Fawful going on."

"So, what did I do?" Dawn cried.

The author continued reading her guide book. "After the cut-scene, Bowser and Midbus have a quick battle. _But_, because you put him to sleep in the last chapter, that isn't happening."

"Oh."

"So now Bowser's just standing there, wondering why he feels like something's supposed to happen there. Therefore, you have broken the storyline _big time_."

Star was still wondering what they were talking about.

"Um, my bad!" Dawn did a sweatdrop.

"Also, it's not looking good for the Fourth Wall…"

The author's voice left and the scene went back to Bowser.

Bowser shrugged. "Oh well, might as well move on and go to my castle!"

"No, you can't!" Starlow cried. "You have to go to Peach's castle!"

"Think again. He's going to his castle," the author said.

"That settles it then!" Bowser said.

So Bowser headed for his castle, unaware of the journey that was to come…

* * *

**So sorry this chapter was so short! XP  
But never fear, I'm not done! Bowser's Retarded Story is only on hold for now. :)  
_And_, I have plans for another story. I will start working on it soon. ^^**

**~Dawn**


	8. Fawful's Taking Over

**Well, I finally did it. I finished writing chapter 8! :D**

**This is your Christmas present, Hawkholly! XD  
**

**Hawkholly: Merry Christmas! ^^  
**

**Friend of Fawful: I don't want to know, either. XD  
I would never discontinue this; I'm having too much fun with it. :)  
**

**EpicallyAwesome1601: Wait, it gets better in this chapter! XD  
**

**Elemental Queen: Writing other stuff for a while _did _help. :)  
**

**ME IS A PIKACHU: XD**

**The Dark Star: Glad you seem to like it. :)**

* * *

"Well, like that weird voice in the sky said in the last chapter, I better get going to my castle," Bowser said to himself.

Somewhere far off, some Koopas that were fixing the Fourth Wall started cursing loudly as it fell down again.

"Aw, for the love of Grambi!" one of them said.

A second Koopa just shouted a long string of cruse words for five minutes.

The last one just threw down his box of Band-Aids and yelled, "I quit!"

Yes, they were attempting to repair the mighty Fourth Wall with Band-Aids.

Unaware of what had just happened, Bowser started walking again. He soon came across a Chuboomba and a battle started.

"Hey! Aren't you part of my army?" Bowser asked.

"Nope. You fired me for getting stomped too many times," the Chuboomba answered.

"Oh, yeah. I remember you now!" Bowser did a sweatdrop. "You've, uh…changed."

"Thanks. But I still have to kill you."

So the chubby Goomba started to attack Bowser, but ended up losing the fight.

Bowser continued walking and soon ran into another Chuboomba.

"Oh, come on!" he roared. "How many of you guys _are _there?!"

"This is what happens to all the Goomba who used to be a part of your force. After you fire us we just come out here and enjoy life."

"…"

Bowser beat up the Chuboomba then went around killing all the others while he was at it.

Meanwhile, back with Dawn and Star again…

"We've been standing here long enough," Dawn said. "It's time to go in, Star."

"Yeah, I guess you're right."

The two girls went into Boswer's castle.

"Hey, Randy!" Dawn greeted a Koopa that was near by. "I have something to tell you. It's really important."

Randy gave her a blank stare. "Do I…know you?"

"Of course you do! It's me, Dawn Starlight!" Dawn was shocked her friend didn't recognize her.

"…nope. Doesn't ring a bell. By any chance, are you a friend of Lord Fawful's?"

"Lord…" Dawn did an anime style eye twitch. "Ohhhh shrooms…"

She and Star heard childish laugher behind them. They turned around and saw Fawful standing in the doorway behind them.

"Welling, look who's finally here!"

Star glared at him. "So, _you're _the one causing all the trouble today!"

"You could be saying that."

"Let me tell you something mister; causing trouble is _my _job around here, so I'm going to have to ask you to stop!"

Dawn did a facepalm. "That's _not _why we're stopping him…"

"It's not? FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU—"

"I HAVE CHORTLES!"

"You shut up! And Star, no swearing!"

"Aren't you all getting a little off topic here?" the author asked.

The Fourth Wall fell yet again.

"GRAMBI DANG IT!"

"…"

The author quickly shut up and continued typing so as not to break the Fourth Wall again.

That joke was getting a little old anyway.

The author _also _decided to stop using her caps lock key.

Back to the story!

"Dawn, you might want to move," Star warned her. "I've got this."

Dawn walked to entrance of the castle and pushed Fawful towards Star.

"She's so gonna end your game," she whispered.

Star's body started glowing. She jumped into the air, and when the glowing stopped she was a Latias.

"…"

"Bring it on!" Star began attacking Fawful with psychic attacks.

Dawn simply stood there, watching. Even if it wasn't for quite the right reason, Star would definitely be a big help in saving the Mushroom Kingdom.

As she watched Star chase Fawful around Bowser's castle, Dawn began to wonder about Fawful's minion.

Heh heh, he would probably be waking up any minute now…

* * *

Midbus yawned as he sat up.

He didn't really understand what had happened, but he felt well rested now.

Wait…where was the girl?

He franticly looked around, but the girl wasn't anywhere to be seen.

"Oh shoot…"

* * *

**I'm such a trouble maker! ;D  
**

**~Dawn  
**


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